Wednesday, August 15, 2012


Today.  Just today.  This is my day:

I'm going to wake up.  Excited to see what is going to happen.

Work.  You know, that thing that pays the bills.  Have a job. Well, I don't really have a job. I have to make money in order to support myself and my boys. The one whom pulls it off.   I'm very lucky.  I've created my own luck.

But, today, I'm going to create my life.

You know, the one that we always wanted.  The life we think everyone else is living.  It's better than ours, right?

Today.  Well, today, is the day....

Today, I'm going to get up and work.  I'm going to work out.  Or ride my bike.  If it's hockey season, I'm going to take my sons to hockey. Come home cook dinner, watch a TV show. Help the boys with their homework. Do some laundry. The house will cleaned up.

OH.......what did you say?????  There is a party in Vail?  I'm going. A party down the street - and you want the boys to come hang out with their friends?  There is a bike ride around the corner?  The potluck around the corner?

You have free tickets to an outdoor concert?  Oh, by the way, no I don't mind if the pre-party is at my house?.......Yes, you can bring a friend.  And they can bring a friend too.

Want to get your nails done? Have you bought your ski pass yet?  What do you want me to do?  Where do you want me to show up????

Today.  WAIT!!!!!

I keep "tri-ing"; I tri and tri again to make my life mold into something that doesn't work for me.  Yet, I still fight it.

90% - acceptance rate.  That's where I'm at.  Pretty darn good.

I'm limiting myself to 21 days in August. Fifteen and a half days scattered during the year.  Those are the days weeks every year I can pretend I live like society tells us.  10% of the time.

The other 90% - I'm accepting that this is how my TODAY looks:

My sons
Do what I can to make my life better by spending the time helping the organizations my children are involved in.
Work (3 hours per day)

See/visit/talk to family/friends - have lunch, go the movies, network, enjoy my life.

Play - bike ride,ski, surf, run, sit on the couch and watch a movie, holding my breath, attending my Hula Hoop class

The 10% of my life??????   Day in Day out

Work  (6 hours per day)

Hockey/sports/organizational things for other people

36.5 days.  I can do the 10% if I can do the other 90%.

Today, I"m playing a grown up, in a real life, created by me.  Today.  Only 35.5 more days to go.....

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