Saturday, June 30, 2012

It's been a year

One year ago tomorrow, I arrived in Kona for the first time.  I had no idea what to expect.  A wide open slate of opportunities and adventures to fill in my life.

In the past 12 months - I've now been in Kona for a total of 8 weeks.  2 months out of the 12.  Guess you can say we like it here.

LOVE the water.  Although I do catch myself thinking,  "it would nice to be dry for a day".  Not sure if I really mean that or not.  Because, I go to the water every day.  And I get in the water.  The whole "dry off" thing - it just a thought.  Truly, I think, if it were up to me, I wouldn't ever be dry. That's the problem, I have to dry off.

LOVE the weather.  It's perfect.  EVERY single day.  Every single day that I was here for 2 months.  Where we are living (the coffee region), it rains every afternoon and some nights.  Everything is SO LUSH.  (Of course, the Kokies and Mosquito's are bad.  Hey, it can't all be perfect in paradise.

LOVE the people.  The locals and the tourist.  LOVE the whole experience of them all.

This of course is not the real world.  Or is it?  I work.  I play.  We don't have hockey or anything "organized".  Organized is what the real world is - "lessons, schedules, etc".  Lily has swim team M,W,F - she has a bit of a schedule.  The rest of us (in this group), not so much.......

Nolan and I are wrapping up two weeks on the island.  He pointed out, this time last year, the trip was almost over.  (The boys were here 15 days, me 31).   He said it would totally stink if we were leaving on Monday (like we did last year).  I said, are you ready to go home?  "No way" not even close.  I'm not sure it's because he's been an only child for 2 weeks.   Or if it's the facts he's got a girl and doesn't want his brother to show up and for her to like him better.  Who can blame him.  There is nothing like a first crush, nothing like a first heartache.

4th of July is my FAVORITE holiday.  Absolute favorite.  It's a "no guilt" holiday.  There are no presents.  You don't have to go see anyone.  You don't have to please anyone for this holiday.  PLUS, I love fireworks.  The fireworks here are in the ocean.  A year ago, I sat on the rocks in town and watched the fireworks.

This year (I have a fiscal year - July 1 to July 1), has been a good year. I'm a very fortunate person.  I fell in love, I got my heart broke, I recovered, I had fun, lots of joy and I"M BACK IN KONA for the summer.  

I love this weekend.  Always have.  I moved to Colorado 20 years ago tomorrow.

I started in recruiting 19 years ago tomorrow.

I went into labor with Nolan 13 years ago tomorrow.

And a year ago, I set out on a journey expecting nothing.  And my, oh, my did I receive so much more......

Ramblings and firsts

Last year, I wrote a blog on "firsts" and the "firsts" we keep having on the island.  They continue - and not necessarily adventures, but both adventures and moments.

Some ramblings from this side of the world:

  • It's funny how you can see yourself in pictures and not really care that is how you  REALLY look in a bikini.  For all you out there - WEAR it proud.  WEAR what/how you are comfortable. You look better than you think. I don't think I've thought that before.  Or maybe I should just cover up
  • There is truly nothing like watching two kids like each other.  I'm not talking true love.  I'm not talking about forever.  I'm talking about you and me liking each other. There are no "real world" friends around.  And when you and me are 13 years old, there are no words.  There are no words when parents are around.  Yes, Nolan will talk to me.  Lily will talk to me.  Nolan and Lily will not talk to each other if anyone else is around.  To see them on the raft together, in the back of the pick up or running down the street - it's a story filled with words and laughter.
  •  Nolan is SO self-consciences of his size.  It breaks my heart knowing there isn't anything I can do to help this situation.  However, his self confidence continues to inspire me.
  • Our waiter at "happy hour" tonight looks all of 12 years old.  Okay, he looks older than that, but younger than Duncan (whom is 14),  He comes back to our table and says to Nolan "I hear you did the half marathon on Sunday.  How was it?".  Really.  Nolan has a conversation and Dylan (the waiter) leaves.  I wonder who told him?  How did he know?  We did ask, but the answer didn't matter. Nolan and Dylan spoke about looking young and he told him, he would like it someday.  And when Lily arrived to join us, well, I saw Dylan give Nolan "the wink".  It's fun sitting at a table with a rockstar.
  • I'm not sure and I really don't want to know, but I think there was a first kiss. (last summer - it was truth or dare kiss - a spin the bottle type of kiss).  And if even there wasn't, in the history book of life, can we just give them this moment?
  • I took the stitches out of the bottom of my foot today.  First time for stitches - first time to remove stitches.  
  • I'm 43 years old, I thought I was slowing down on the "firsts" I have.  I just want to keep having the adventureous type...... 
And the summer is just heating up.

It's a Lion, It's a Tiger....

No, it's Mahi, It's a Marlin, It's an Ahi - NO, it's a SHARK!!!!

Holy cow batman - we caught a shark today.

Yes, a big shark - the kind you see in aquariams - the real ones.  Or on a movie.  Not off the freaking boat!!!

I met a couple back in February named Lance and Georgie.  Georgie suggested I go fishing with the guys the next day.  I did - I'm the type of person whom shows up if you invite me.  Please don't invite me if you don't mean it, I don't have a "no thank you" filter.  Especially when there is an adventure involved.

When I got back to town two weeks ago, I called Lance to let him know I was back in town.  Asked if they could meet for drinks or if he was going out fishing.

Monday he called and said they were going out today.  Nolan and I went.

There were 7 of us.  And a dog (not Dakota - our house dog) - Roxie.  She even wears a life vest.

We caught 7 "aku" (I could have this one wrong) and 1 "ahi" (a little one, with half the filet in my fridge).  We take one of the live "aku" and "live bait it".  In other words, there is a live fish on the line with a hook through it attached to the line on a big reel off the boat.  The line is then attached, to a rubber band.  When the rubber band snaps, the captain (Lance) then speeds up the boat - and SNAP, we hooked him. 

Now the next part, for me, was hysterical.  It was like a bunch of little girls on the boat.  I was up top, looking down at it all.  Lance is yelling what to do to everyone below - everyone is scrambling. 

All I could think was, "where is my beer - this a show, I'm ready to watch".  Nolan is sitting next to me and that exactly what I told him.  Hang on, here is a show.

We saw the "fish" jump up a couple times.  Each guy had a different thought on what it might be.  Whatever it might be, it was freaking heavy and fighting.

Back and forth.  Back and forth. Ahi, Marlin, Ohno,   45 minutes later everyone is still going through their rants.  Then all at once.......  The whole boat, in unison - "SHARK".

The moment it saw the boat - about 10 feet away - he was gone.  STRAIGHT down.  The line snapped and the game was over.

And as disappointing as it is not to be eating Tuna for dinner, it was WAY cool to see a 7 foot 400 pound shark on the line behind the boat. 

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

You know you're a local when......

  • You avoid town on "Cruise Ship Wednesday"
  • OR you spend as much time as you can in town that day, just to people watch
  • Your son complains of all the "tourists" at the beach
  • It's actually possible to schedule something around sunset - without worrying that you will miss the sunset.
  •  Someone asks if you have a house here - and instead of explaining the whole crazy situation, you just say "yes"
  • you say you live in Holualoa to the clerk to enter your address, you don't have to spell it for her.  (good thing, not sure I knew how to spell it)
  • We actually "own" our own water sports equipment
  • We are not quite so "white"
  • You shower outside - or with complete strangers at the beach
  • You change clothes in the parking lot - and never show any extra skin.
  • You have to listen to you iPod in the car, because you know Bob Marley or some stupid love song will be on the radio otherwise
  • You can give someone directions to your house - in the dark, in the rain and they make it to see you.
  • Mahalo comes out instead of "thank you"
And the true test.....

  • You see a Rooster in the middle of the road, you speed up......

Happiness is......

  • a sunset
  • a day at the beach
  • laughter
  • finding a piece of beach glass
  • letting kids ride in the back of the truck - on the side roads, well cause it's fun.
  • floating in the water
  • Hula Hooping on the beach - regardless of what everyone else thinks.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

She finished well

Another moment in life.

While training for my first marathon, during the end, it was brutal.  Brutal in that all I wanted to do was cry.  Everything made me cry.  My periods stopped.  Every song on the radio made me cry.  EVERYTHING made me cry.

Stop it.  Stop crying.  Save those tears.  Save them for the finish line.  The finish line  - IN THE OLYMPIC STADIUM in GREECE in ATHENS - you know the moment you have been waiting for.  THEN, you can cry.

 Had it under control.  In fact, SO under control - the moment finally happened.  I ran 5 hours.  I'm in Athens, Greece and NOTHING.  NOTHING.  No feelings.  No emotions.  NOTHING.  The only thing that entered my mind?  "Holy Shit.  I did it".  Seriously, all I could do was cry for the last 3 months and at this moment, here it is, all I get is "NOTHING".

That was the finish line.

What I forget, and you didn't know - were the two moments that did make me cry.  Not at the finish line, just along the way.  Those unexpected moments in life that make you cry.

Mile 18.  My arm was chaffing.  And I couldn't get my chaffing cream open.  I'm standing at mile 18, asking the medic to cut open my cream.  We are in the middle of Greece.  We finish it all - I'm ready to go.  He's says to me:  "Carry On".  What?  I say.  ' Carry On".   Carolyn and I have always said that to each other - no matter where you are, what you are doing, or whenever you need me:  "Carry On"  - I'll come get you.  And here is this complete stranger medic guy telling me to "Carry On".  He had said it twice, I smiled, and knew Carolyn was there with me.  I can make it now.

Mile 9.

I can tell this story better than I can write it.  This moment changed my life forever. I know, "I could NEVER do that".  WHATEVER, it is.  I'm here to tell you.  YES YOU CAN.  I said the same thing.  I can't do it.  I don't want to.  THERE is the difference.  It's okay NOT to want to do something.  YOU CAN DO IT.  You have to want it.

I'm at mile 9.  I look up.  And suddenly, I don't know where he was, but suddenly he was in front of me.  In all pink.  A pink shirt.  Pink Hat, Pink socks.  You know, the pink. The pink.  And it says on the back of his shirt in big bold letters  "SHE FINISHED WELL".

I only hope she knew how much he loved her.

It still makes me cry.

Monday, June 25, 2012

My moments

I ran the same race as Nolan on Sunday.  Nolan is 12.  He will be 13 a week from today.  WE ran a half marathon - he finished in the top 100.  He's 12.  The youngest participant in the Kona Half Marathon.  I finished - with 9 stitches in the bottom of my foot.

Lily and Al ran the 5k - because of us.  Al has always been a runner.  Lily, she's a swimmer.  A really good swimmer.  They both placed first in their age division for the 5k.  Lily won a $60 gift certificate for the running store.  This was her first 5k.

Al ran Nolan in - They were waiting for him.  Nolan ran 8:36 minute miles.  AVERAGE.  13.1 miles.  His first.  If he would have run the 5k, he would have placed 1st in his age division too.  But, he's done one of those before.

It was cool to see my son on the corner, as I turned to run into the finish line standing there with his medal on.  Waiting for me, at the finish line. 

After the race - the after party, the awards.  People watching.  We got our picture taken with "Uncle John"  (founder of the Kona Marathon). (Oh, and in Hawaii you don't call anyone Mr/Mrs - you call people Uncle/Auntie)  We are still waiting to see if we made the island blog.  Then the radio DJ got Nolan on stage to congratulate him on being the Kona Marathon's youngest half marathon participant.   It was fun, at least for me.

As we all know, the moments that usually mean the most to us, come from some place out of the blue.  The place we least expect it.  That surreal moment that surprises us:

Nolan passing me at mile 7 (it was a loop) - made my day
Seeing Nolan waiting for me.
Seeing Lily 2 feet later waiting for me too
Seeing Al looking for me at the finish line
Getting drinks bought for us at Huggo's for completing the race

 Petra and her daughter were from Vancouver.  Petra came in second the 50 - 59 half marathon.  Her daughter was 28.  Nolan was laying on the ground.  Petra says to me, "he kept me going".  Huh?  Pointing to the kid on the the ground.  He took off fast, and then we got into a rhythm - Nolan paced at 8:36, she at 8:39.  "Every time I thought about slowing down, he was there to keep me going".  There were tears in my eyes.  Petra and her daughter do races together.  Petra and her husband have traveled the world doing marathons, triathlons, etc.  In fact, they are doing the "7 continents" goal - a marathon on each continent.  Oh, I went to Greece with "Marathon Tours" - Oh, we went to somewhere with them too......  Of course you did, circles get smaller all the time....  

They leave, we leave.  We are all walking to our cars.  We run into them again.  Petra turns around and says "I just told my daughter, we are going to see them again".  And I can't put into words what she meant, or what I felt, but yes, I will run into this person again in life.  You know, that random person you meet once and then again you meet randomly AGAIN.  On a plane, a boat, or maybe an island......

For a moment.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

You only get one first

In 2010, I ran my first marathon.

October 31, 2010   Athens, Greece.  The 2,500 (that would be the twenty fifth hundred) anniversary of the original running of the marathon.  From Marathon, Greece to Athens, Greece.

I trained.  I ran.  I ran an ad on Craigslist and found two incredible running buddies.  In fact, I've found lots of incredible stuff on Craigslist.

Near the end of my training, I was SO burned out on running.  Burned out, like, I never even want to walk again, much less run.  If you show me another pair of running shoes, I will throw them at you - sick of running.  This is THE marathon though.  I have to train.

NEVER was it on the list.  Okay, that's a lie. It was on the list.  WAY down there on the list.  But it was there.  ONLY, Laurel and I thought we would do it when we were 60.  Quite honestly, I thought it would be the Dallas White Rock Marathon.  The little voice in my head always said "go back, to where it began".

When I was a child, my mom had my sister and I volunteer with her at the Dallas White Rock Marathon.  We didn't have much money and I remember loving the free t-shirts we got from volunteering.  She taught us to give.  And looking back, you realize you can give and get so much in return.

I always thought THAT would be the one.

Then I got an e-mail.  The twenty fifth hundred anniversary of the original running.  There was no "HALF" option.  It was the full or a 10k. First thought, "I'm not going all the way to Greece to run a 10k".  If there is a first one to do, well, wouldn't this be the one???    The FIRST?

Then, a little angel spoke to me.  You know, those angels whom look at us with big eyes like we have never thought of it before.  And this angel actually came through the same group whom I learned about the marathon.  I said "I"m so sick of training.  What do I do to keep going?"  And this angel said to me "you only get one first.  Just remember that".

Once again, you never know when you are going to change someone's life.  She was right.  You only get one first.  It completely changed my attitude.  So I made a sticker and wore it on my back "YOU ONLY GET ONE FIRST".

Near the finish line, when people would tell me to hang on, you are almost there - it made all the difference.

TOMORROW, we are back to another first.

My youngest sons' first half marathon.  We've been training.

He's a runner.  I run. HUGE difference.

It's funny.  People go, "Oh, you are running together?" "No," I reply, "We are running the same race".  BIG DIFFERENCE.

He's super excited.  I'm super excited for him too.

Today is Saturday.  On Tuesday, I fell off a board in the bay that has something out for me.  I sliced my foot open.  9 stitches.

I've never had accidental stitches before.  The arch of my foot.

Here is what I said to the doctor:

I faint during pain
Clean it out well
I'm running the half marathon on Sunday.

This is what he said to me:

This is going to hurt
I'm giving you shots on the bottom of your foot
I don't normally give stitches on the arch of the foot, but I have a feeling you aren't going to do what I tell you.
I making the knot's ugly so you know how to cut them out in 7 to 10 days.  If you don't listen to anything else, just wait the 10 days.  
Stay out of the water for 10 days
Keep it dry and stay off of it.

Conclusion: - or should I say, my compromise:

9 stitches on the arch of my foot
Ugly knots - 3 pairs of surgical scissors (they throw them all away), a pair of tweezers.  I can take them out.
Round of antibiotics
A foot bootie

Yeah, right.

This is all about Nolan and his first.  Maybe I'm being selfish. When I signed up for it, I asked him, "Do you want to do the half too".  After all, if you are going to pick a first, you only get one.   Is it too much for a mom to ask, well, to share that first?

Selfishly, you only get to run your sons first half marathon with him, well, once. And as long as the foot isn't gushing blood, well......

See you at the finish line.......

The National Enquirer Called

They said "You win"  We couldn't even make this stuff up.

We are all adults here.  Let's put it all on the table. 

The boyfriend has an old girlfriend living at his house.  I've known this since she moved in, in October.   We live 3,000 miles apart.  We all understand.

You also understand, I'm going to see other people too.  We all understand.

Now we have kids involved.  I have told my sons the truth from the very beginning.  You weren't so wise.  Kids are resilient - in fact, we are all resilient, IF we all know the truth - were everyone stands. 

My daughter likes you because you have two cute sons her age.  Yes, she does.  She also likes me, well, because, I'm me.  Wait, now she doesn't like my sons, and wants to hang out with me.  Which is it?  Does she like my sons?  Does she like me? 

I've told you before, I love your daughter, but what I really care about is whom her dad loves. 

Sometimes (and yes I realize I use that word over and over again), we deflect our pain and suffering into another.  Isn't that why we can play the "victim"?  It's not really our fault.  Someone else made us do it.  We have to do it because......  I wasn't strong enough because of my childhood or my brother or my boss or my mother-in-law - they all beat me down.  It was their fault. 

Still believing that story?

I can't do this.



Those four words are really important in a conversation.  Usually, we all stop short.  Of course we do.  It's easier.  We don't want to hurt feelings.  We want it all to be nice.  Life isn't always nice.

I'm going to try. 

Wait, wasn't that my theme for this year?  I completely forgot about it, until I just wrote those words.  I'm going to try - except I spelled it "tri". 

Tri - three?  Three chances?  One more time?  "Tri" again? 

Right now - I'm walking away. Please don't ask me to stay.  Don't ask me to be more than I can, because you can't be more than you are.  You can't say RIGHT NOW.  Instead, you keep saying "You have to have Lily be on my side.  I need you to help make this situation better". 

Guess what?  I can't.  I won't.  I can't do this.  On a train.  On a boat.  On an island.  With you.  Right now.

The National Enquirer called, they said "you win" - we couldn't make this stuff up.....

Friday, June 22, 2012

Do you ever really like someone, like you do

when you are 12? 

What, really, is there to like?  Do you like to do the same things I like to do?  Oh, yeah, and are you cute?  And I mean cute by, when you show up at the beach, do you have the cool toys?  And like to play?  What's not to like?

Then life gets confusing.  Because by next summer, you might have liked someone else.  You then arrive this year with last years feelings expecting the last year hasn't happened.  But, what if, you show up, and once again, just want to play?  You know, the play in the water.  The made up games we used to play.  Imagine.  Dream.  The laughter.

This year, I might like you.  You know.  Like you, like you.  Volleyball on the beach isn't the same.  It makes me smile differently when I see you dive for that ball.  It might make me like you more.  In a different way than how I thought I liked you.  In the better way. 

Suddenly, we can't spend the night at each others house.  Well, cause you're a girl and I'm a boy.  Our parents said no this year. 

It only took me 4 days to talk to you.  Even though, just like you, I've been waiting all year to talk to you.  I'm just too shy to admit it.  Aren't we always too shy to admit it?

I hope we are always friends. 

My mom has always friends.  Friends she met years ago.  Friends that are male.  Friends that are female.  As she says, friends arrive in all shapes and sizes in the most unexpected places.  My mom collects friends. Your dad does too. 

She told me, this year is going to be different.  I got a long on and on explanation of what is NOT going to happen this summer.  Then next thing I know, we are sitting with you watching the sunset with your dad and my mom.  She said wasn't going to happen this year.  She was wrong.  She's okay with that - being wrong thing.  We all make mistakes.

Mom has these friends that she met one summer and she says it was 25 years ago.  They are always friends.  Two brothers.  We know those brothers.  It's hard to think that we all might still be friends 25 years from now.  But your dad says the same thing:  "I hope you know these boys forever" 

You never know.

Stranger things have happened.  We might be those brothers. 

Thursday, June 21, 2012

I can't make this stuff up

Any of it.

I don't watch television.  Well, sometimes.  I don't watch reality TV.  There is no way their life is better than mine.  AND most importantly, I really don't need the drama that I think these shows provide.

Life is good.  Life is bad.  It has it's ups and downs.  That's the way it is.  Comes and goes.

There is a country song out by a young guy titled "Storm Warning".  I sorta feel that is what people should be given before I come into their life.  I also feel, well, I should be giving a warning about what is going to happen in mine.  Don't you feel that way? Some type of warning.....

Last time I was in Hawaii I was looking for a "sign".  A sign on what I was supposed to do with my life, NEXT.  You know, that sign, that points you down the hall and says "enter here".  My, oh, my, don't we wish life was really that simple.

THIS time, I'm not sure whom needed the warning - me or the island.  SHE's BAAAAAACCCCK.  I heard the island whisper.....

Today is Wednesday, I've been here approximately 36 hours.  I've met my boyfriends old girlfriend, whom is living in his guest house.  I've been on a board.  I've snorkeled.  I've run.  Someone offered to buy Nolan and I a drink, because he said we looked happy - and wanted to share the joy.  We watched a sunset. I've worked. We've spent 3 hours in the emergency room getting 9 stitches in my right foot from falling off the board.  And I can't breathe!!!

AND TONIGHT:  the biggest sign yet:  We are at Huggo's - watching the sunset.  Our waitress Amanda made the comment about today being the summer solstice.  I said isn't that tomorrow?  (My birthday is June 12 - so I always remember it by being June 21)..  Instead of telling me "no, it's today".  She's replies:  "Well, it is Leap Year".........

Not sure what kind of sign/warning that is/was, but I heard it.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Packing hopes and dreams

This time last year, I was getting ready for a similar journey.  Packing up my house.  My life and going to a new place.  The experience of new adventures.  And OH the list.  The list of things that HAD to be done:

Clean the house
Get rid of stuff we never use
Store the "important stuff" in a "safe" place

I'm doing the same thing, AGAIN.  To the same place - well, not exactly, going to live NEXT DOOR.  How do I explain this?  "Neighbor Joe" - I'm living in his house.  Technically, that would now make me the neighbor to my "other house".  These are confusing times.

Are things ever the same NEXT time?  Of course not.  Time.  Perception. Wisdom.  Those things have all changed.  Actually, I guess, things are the same, it's US (people) whom change.  Hopefully.

My oldest son and I were talking about our upcoming adventure.  He says "I can't wait to......"  and mentioned several things we did last summer.  He made it very clear he wanted nothing to do with anything for the "tourist".  Everything he wanted to do - those were the "moments" that made the trip. We then spoke about how things might be different this year.  He says to me "Mom, I really don't like your attitude".  Yes, that made me smile too......

Life is made up of "moments".  When we look back, we remember those moments.  Then the stories blur.  The moments stick out.  THEN, that becomes the story.  In reality, it was one afternoon.  What starts as a "chapter" of your book, 30 years later, has moved from a chapter, to a page, to a paragraph, to a sentence, to a footnote.  Or a moment.  Full circle.

Here I am, packing.  Cleaning.  Creating my list of all the things I'm doing this summer.  Same time, next year.  Only THIS year, I'm going to........

I'm going to get back on that board.
I have no activity plans
I'm running a half marathon with my youngest son
I'm packing a pair of running shoes and a pair of flip flops (those I bought last year in Kona) and the shoes I wear on the plane.
Two swim suits - okay, I'm lying, three.
We are eating poke every day.
Be tired of avocados
Not worry about my list of - wait, make that any list of, well, anything.

Because, I learned this lesson already.  You can plan it.  You can not plan it.  You can be disappointed.  You can end up somewhere that wasn't on the list.  You can pack high heels, dresses, hopes, dreams and lots of other stuff in that suitcase.  And we all know, maybe it would be better to leave that suitcase at baggage claim.

And, by the way, that "important stuff" you put in a "safe" place - you might as well have dropped that at baggage claim too.  You already have the "important stuff" with you.  You knew that......

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Season Premier - Coming Soon

When we last left you, Leasa was leaving the Big Island.  She had delivered a statement.  A message. 

During the off-season - there was a visit.  A fun-filled glorious weekend of a visit. 

Last year's feelings, this year's reality.

We will give you another hint - the house in Denver is rented out.  There is a house waiting in Kona.  Not sure if EVERYONE is waiting or not.  

Stay tuned......

Season Premier is Monday.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

You have 20 seconds

That's all you will need. 

You have 20 seconds, go.........

What would you do if someone told you, "you have 20 seconds".  Would you ask questions?  Would you go?  Would you freeze?  What if they whispered, "you only have to be brave for 20 seconds."  Would the world open for you??

20 seconds.  That's it.  Not 30, heck that's almost a minute.  And well, a minute, might as well be 5.  And 5, that's almost an hour and next thing you know, you are having to be brave all day. 

Not this time.  Twenty seconds.  "You only have to be brave for twenty seconds".

If you haven't seen the movie, "We bought a Zoo" - you have no idea what I'm talking about.  If you have, you might get this post.  If you haven't, get the movie.  Tonight.

We think we have to be brave ALWAYS.  No way.  Just for twenty seconds.  There is a great line in the movie:  Matt Damon says "I had about 15 seconds of braveness left".   He just had to make it through those next 15 seconds. 

Doesn't that make life seem SO much better?  20 seconds.  That's it.  Not for the rest of your life.  Just 20 seconds. 

The next time you have to be brave.  Risk something.  Or risk it all.  You'll know the answer in 20 seconds. 

I'm not telling you you won't fail.  Just you will know sooner than later.

And you know what, you will always know you tried. You have 20 seconds.


Sunday, June 3, 2012

I'm just not ready for that

Last summer while getting the house ready to leave, we boxed up tons of stuff.  We donated old clothes, got rid of stuff we hadn't used in a while and boxed up the valuables and clutter. 

One of the bags/boxes was full of Nolan's stuffed animals.  He was 11 turning 12 last summer.  Still very much a little boy at heart.  Yes, he's the cool hockey goalie.  The cute boy at school whom all the older girls think is cute.  And still a little boy. 

He was a collector of monkeys for years.  We have lots of monkeys.  And he still had this great fish Nemo.  In addition to the other animals on the bed.

Upon returning from the summer,  we un-boxed MOST of the stuff.  The bag of stuffed animals went into his room.  A few months later, they were all still in the bag.  I asked if it was time to put them away.  As in, put the bag in the attic or crawl space.  He said yes.

I guess if you've now kissed a girl, it's time to put your stuffed animals away.  (and I just realized Nolan is now a follower of this blog - sorry Nolan, it's part of the story!)

This summer we are getting the house ready again.  Nolan mentions, "You know the little girl whom is going to come stay in our house this summer?  Maybe she would like my old stuffed animals".  "That is very sweet Nolan.  She would probably like some of them.  Others, I'm not quite ready to give away". 

What?  He smiled.  If you've seen Toy Story 3, you know there comes a time when they have to go to a new home. 

Maybe some of them can go.  Last summer, I had suggested we take Nemo with us and let him go in the ocean.  The reply was "Mom, he would just sink".  ;-)  I do laugh when I think of this stuffed Nemo fish floating around the bay.   But, Nemo's the one I really can't get rid of.

Maybe I'll be ready next summer........