I've been here a month already. From date to date - exactly a month. From the calendar, I've been here for 4 weeks and two days.
How the heck did that happen? No wonder I woke up one day in Colorado and realized I've been living there 21 years. I woke up today, and it's been three summers in Kona.
I asked the boys if they were ready to go back. This time last year, this was our last full day. The lifeguard competition was today, and we left the next night.
The first summer was filled with adventure and wonder. What will happen? There is so much we want to do.
The second summer was filled with a routine and bit of unwanted drama. But still the adventure of what will happen and what can we do.
This summer? We've settled into our life here on the island. We have routines. Habits. Friends. We are doing things we have done before. But also new things.
Why is it in our own town, we stop exploring the new things? I KNOW I haven't done everything there is to do in Colorado, much less Denver. Our town becomes HERE, rather than THERE. We feel we must go THERE, to try something new. When there are plenty of adventures to be had in our own backyard.
Well, we are now HERE doing old things. Still trying new things. Not sure when THERE became HERE.
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Friday, July 19, 2013
Things I never thought I would say
Here are some things I've said, out loud, that I never thought I would:
- Would you like guacamole on that? And by that, I mean anything as we have now run out of ideas of what to use avocado's for. I did find a recipe for stuffed avocados - still have to try that.
- What else can we do with bananas? The bananas in the backyard are about to be ripe - and we will have approximately 1 week to consume 50 or so bananas. I know, I know, we will freeze some, but seriously 50 plus bananas.
- Did you get all the sand out of the hot tub?
- I think there is something growing in my hair. Seriously, I can't get a brush through this curly mop and if it's not growing, something might be living there.
- I GET to wake up at 5:45am (it's sleeping in) and to start my day by paddling.
- Did anyone bring a dry towel?
- You have to pack the cooler, unload the dishwasher and shake the sand out of your bed, before going to bed.
- Anyone know what happened to the "dry clothes" bag?
- Teenagers are pretty darn cute when they are in love. Not sure I'll say the same thing next summer, but for now, I'm sticking with my statement.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Monday in Paradise
There are seven days a week here in paradise. Much like every place else in life.
As a society, we all tend to view "Monday" well, as the start of "work". I try to balance life and work. Understanding, there are no distinct lines in my life. My life blurs between work and play. It seems to work for me.
But I do have "Mondays", sometimes they arrive on Wednesday. Sometimes they arrive, well, on Monday.
Why do people dread Monday? Most people I know wouldn't want to spend all week doing what they do on the weekends? Yard work. Shopping. Riding their bike.
Okay, maybe I lie. Maybe I do know a few people whom would like to do what they do on the weekends all week. But we have to pay the bills. So, Monday comes and people go work doing something they don't love or even like.
They do it for money. Only money doesn't buy us happiness, it buys us freedom. Then the habits form. People work, because that is what they "need" to do. What society tells us to do. "Have a career". "Make something of your life". We've all followed that dream.
Luckily, I've done both. I had an incredible wonderful industrious career. I had a start up that broke even. I've been out on my own for many years now. I just helped a start-up get up and running.
Today, though, was a Monday in July. The time of year I always make changes. July that is. Not Mondays.
Although, I was here a year ago February - I had a Monday then too. That February, I had a deal fall through, been chased by goats, the dog I was dog sitting got head butted and bit by the neighbor dog - ALL BY EIGHT AM HAWAII time. Seriously. If that isn't a Monday, I don't know what is.
Well, I had another Monday today. It actually started on Sunday. Seems my beautiful summer daughter gets in trouble for bringing us up. For wanting to see us. So, we all "were at the same beach yesterday". Oh, yeah, we were all there today too. I'm thinking I should put signs up saying "Warning: There are boys and ex-girlfriends at this beach".
But, well, it's going to happen. So, I'm not fighting it. I'm just here to enjoy my summer. At least the new old girlfriend seems to be on the summer daughter's side. Her moves are a little transparent in the girl can see she's just trying to win her over. But we will take what we can get at the moment.
This morning, the company I've been consulting with, my e-mail no longer would let me log in. Seriously? This is how we are going to break up???? I text the owner: "Do we need to talk?". "Yes" he replies, "did you get my e-mail". "well, you shut down my e-mail, so no I didn't". "Please re-send it to my personal e-mail". Next text to him: "I thought we were mates?" 'We are, we just need to figure out what's next".
I haven't told him, but he knows. I don't have a non-compete or a non-disclosure. I'm not signing one either. Wait, I will, it's just going to cost you.....
And by now, it's 8am. I have to wake the boys up.
It's Monday afternoon on the mainland and you have one pissed off Mama.
"Hell hath no fiery like a woman scorned".
See Monday's exist even in paradise. Don't mess with my kids or my money and we will be fine. After all, I'm a woman from Texas. We all have bad days, but trust me, you want us on your side.
And as a mama, I have two teenagers in love. And there are two moms whom are actually encouraging this situation. Well, whom can blame us? Doesn't someone get the Hollywood version of love? Someone does. Even on a Monday.
As a society, we all tend to view "Monday" well, as the start of "work". I try to balance life and work. Understanding, there are no distinct lines in my life. My life blurs between work and play. It seems to work for me.
But I do have "Mondays", sometimes they arrive on Wednesday. Sometimes they arrive, well, on Monday.
Why do people dread Monday? Most people I know wouldn't want to spend all week doing what they do on the weekends? Yard work. Shopping. Riding their bike.
Okay, maybe I lie. Maybe I do know a few people whom would like to do what they do on the weekends all week. But we have to pay the bills. So, Monday comes and people go work doing something they don't love or even like.
They do it for money. Only money doesn't buy us happiness, it buys us freedom. Then the habits form. People work, because that is what they "need" to do. What society tells us to do. "Have a career". "Make something of your life". We've all followed that dream.
Luckily, I've done both. I had an incredible wonderful industrious career. I had a start up that broke even. I've been out on my own for many years now. I just helped a start-up get up and running.
Today, though, was a Monday in July. The time of year I always make changes. July that is. Not Mondays.
Although, I was here a year ago February - I had a Monday then too. That February, I had a deal fall through, been chased by goats, the dog I was dog sitting got head butted and bit by the neighbor dog - ALL BY EIGHT AM HAWAII time. Seriously. If that isn't a Monday, I don't know what is.
Well, I had another Monday today. It actually started on Sunday. Seems my beautiful summer daughter gets in trouble for bringing us up. For wanting to see us. So, we all "were at the same beach yesterday". Oh, yeah, we were all there today too. I'm thinking I should put signs up saying "Warning: There are boys and ex-girlfriends at this beach".
But, well, it's going to happen. So, I'm not fighting it. I'm just here to enjoy my summer. At least the new old girlfriend seems to be on the summer daughter's side. Her moves are a little transparent in the girl can see she's just trying to win her over. But we will take what we can get at the moment.
This morning, the company I've been consulting with, my e-mail no longer would let me log in. Seriously? This is how we are going to break up???? I text the owner: "Do we need to talk?". "Yes" he replies, "did you get my e-mail". "well, you shut down my e-mail, so no I didn't". "Please re-send it to my personal e-mail". Next text to him: "I thought we were mates?" 'We are, we just need to figure out what's next".
I haven't told him, but he knows. I don't have a non-compete or a non-disclosure. I'm not signing one either. Wait, I will, it's just going to cost you.....
And by now, it's 8am. I have to wake the boys up.
It's Monday afternoon on the mainland and you have one pissed off Mama.
"Hell hath no fiery like a woman scorned".
See Monday's exist even in paradise. Don't mess with my kids or my money and we will be fine. After all, I'm a woman from Texas. We all have bad days, but trust me, you want us on your side.
And as a mama, I have two teenagers in love. And there are two moms whom are actually encouraging this situation. Well, whom can blame us? Doesn't someone get the Hollywood version of love? Someone does. Even on a Monday.
Saturday, July 13, 2013
Living in the jungle
Where we live in Hawaii is tropical. On some land, on the side of a mountain. Coffee trees in the back yard. A couple of lime trees. Bamboo, green grass, wild orchids, a small pond. A fire pit. Wild turkeys and chickens roam through the yard - not always, just sometimes. The rooster hasn't been so annoying this trip.
Either I'm used to the sound now, or there aren't as many roosters.
There are also these animals called mongoose. They are a rodent type creature whom you usually only see on the side of the road, or crossing the road. The story goes: the mongoose were brought to Hawaii to kill all the wild cats. Only someone didn't do their research - cats are nocturnal. Mongoose are not.
Needless to say, the wild cats and the mongoose live nicely together on the island.
They say you can finally call yourself a local when you've run over a mongoose (they are pretty darn fast). Well, I could have run over two this week, only I couldn't do it.
I was able to chase the cat away off the front porch while he still had the mouse IN his mouth. This morning, we ran the cat off, while the bird was still in his mouth.
Needless to say, it's a little "wild" around here.
Either I'm used to the sound now, or there aren't as many roosters.
There are also these animals called mongoose. They are a rodent type creature whom you usually only see on the side of the road, or crossing the road. The story goes: the mongoose were brought to Hawaii to kill all the wild cats. Only someone didn't do their research - cats are nocturnal. Mongoose are not.
Needless to say, the wild cats and the mongoose live nicely together on the island.
They say you can finally call yourself a local when you've run over a mongoose (they are pretty darn fast). Well, I could have run over two this week, only I couldn't do it.
I was able to chase the cat away off the front porch while he still had the mouse IN his mouth. This morning, we ran the cat off, while the bird was still in his mouth.
Needless to say, it's a little "wild" around here.
Friday, July 12, 2013
You can't get there from here
You know when you have a moment you really want to capture? Only there is no way to capture. No picture would do it justice. No word could describe it. It's a just a moment you want to hold on to forever.
I hope I can describe a moment I want to remember forever. Really, it's two moments. Each boy. But it was the same reaction from each of them.
The night after I picked up Nolan from the airport - we had spent the day at the beach and we were headed home. You can drive down the highway - which is really a two way road (sometimes there are three lanes, maybe four at one point, but not far. Granny was surprised the roads were paved (I digress)) home, then make a left turn, go up a windy road for about a mile and then there is the house.
OR
You can take the back road. You turn off the main road, on to the "road in front of the house" - only it's 6 miles from the house. It's windy. There are huge trees. Hairpin turns. Chickens crossing the road. It's plush, it's green (it's paved) and it's beautiful. If you look out between the trees through the passenger side window, you can see the sun and the ocean. Our house is at about 1500 feet elevation, so you are also climbing as you are curving.
There is this one point, about a half mile from the house and I look over at Nolan. There was a smile from EAR TO EAR. There are really no words. A picture wouldn't have done it justice. The biggest smile ever.
A week later, I pick up Duncan. Same sequence of events - airport, beach, back road home. Another smile from EAR TO EAR. I literally could feel him about to explode. I seriously thought he was just going to burst right there in the car.
You could feel the happiness. The joy. The excitement.
One day, I hope wherever they are, they can remember this moment and "get there".
I hope I can describe a moment I want to remember forever. Really, it's two moments. Each boy. But it was the same reaction from each of them.
The night after I picked up Nolan from the airport - we had spent the day at the beach and we were headed home. You can drive down the highway - which is really a two way road (sometimes there are three lanes, maybe four at one point, but not far. Granny was surprised the roads were paved (I digress)) home, then make a left turn, go up a windy road for about a mile and then there is the house.
OR
You can take the back road. You turn off the main road, on to the "road in front of the house" - only it's 6 miles from the house. It's windy. There are huge trees. Hairpin turns. Chickens crossing the road. It's plush, it's green (it's paved) and it's beautiful. If you look out between the trees through the passenger side window, you can see the sun and the ocean. Our house is at about 1500 feet elevation, so you are also climbing as you are curving.
There is this one point, about a half mile from the house and I look over at Nolan. There was a smile from EAR TO EAR. There are really no words. A picture wouldn't have done it justice. The biggest smile ever.
A week later, I pick up Duncan. Same sequence of events - airport, beach, back road home. Another smile from EAR TO EAR. I literally could feel him about to explode. I seriously thought he was just going to burst right there in the car.
You could feel the happiness. The joy. The excitement.
One day, I hope wherever they are, they can remember this moment and "get there".
Thursday, July 11, 2013
The Pied Piper
You know the bulletin board at the grocery store? Or the community center or inside your favorite fish market. You know the place in the middle of nowhere has a bulletin board too.
On those bulletin boards, or taped to counters or to walls there are announcements. Things for sales. Missing pets. Upcoming activities. Services offered. Some of them have those "tear off" slips with a phone number. Others just tell you when and where to go to do/get/see whatever it is. I guess Craigslist is life's ultimate "bulletin board" - and it changed my life.
I'm the person whom stops and looks at those. Not all the time. Not every time. Not only do I look at them, I then act upon those little "callings" in life. I call. I show up.
Example One: Jr Lifeguard training. There was a half of a piece of paper taped to the wall between the public bathrooms on the public beach last summer.
Example Two: Craigslist - I could list a million things here, but that's an older blog.
Example Three: Last week in a place called "The Poke Shack" (pronounced Po-kee), there was a flyer on the counter about a "FREE BOOTCAMP" Three weeks - every Wednesday and Saturday.
I had gone paddling on Saturday morning, so I missed the first Saturday. I went on Wednesday. There were 5 of us plus the instructor and her husband. The boot camp is on the same lawn as the bay where I go paddle. It was a good work out. When it was almost over, I asked, "So, why are you doing this for free". She answered, "well, we are in town for 3 weeks and I don't want to work out alone. That way I have people to work out with.". Okay, I'm now in love with the best idea ever.
What a great idea!!! Find something you like to do. Tell others that you are offering it "for free" - boom, you suddenly have a group of people all doing what you like to do!
Yes, we all spoke about how it hard to go do something on your own, by yourself. It's always easier when you have someone else. Yet, here we were, a group of individuals, going to do something by ourselves with other people.
Then in turn, I told them about me and the Canoe Club. "It's right here, Tues/Thurs/Sat at 6:30am or 8am - be about ten minutes early. It's a great group. Everyone is very friendly and it's free." (If you want to join the club you can, which I did today - the dues are good for a year)
One of the women from boot camp showed up this morning for paddling, and she brought a friend. Another one showed up for the 8am group.
And so it continues.....
On those bulletin boards, or taped to counters or to walls there are announcements. Things for sales. Missing pets. Upcoming activities. Services offered. Some of them have those "tear off" slips with a phone number. Others just tell you when and where to go to do/get/see whatever it is. I guess Craigslist is life's ultimate "bulletin board" - and it changed my life.
I'm the person whom stops and looks at those. Not all the time. Not every time. Not only do I look at them, I then act upon those little "callings" in life. I call. I show up.
Example One: Jr Lifeguard training. There was a half of a piece of paper taped to the wall between the public bathrooms on the public beach last summer.
Example Two: Craigslist - I could list a million things here, but that's an older blog.
Example Three: Last week in a place called "The Poke Shack" (pronounced Po-kee), there was a flyer on the counter about a "FREE BOOTCAMP" Three weeks - every Wednesday and Saturday.
I had gone paddling on Saturday morning, so I missed the first Saturday. I went on Wednesday. There were 5 of us plus the instructor and her husband. The boot camp is on the same lawn as the bay where I go paddle. It was a good work out. When it was almost over, I asked, "So, why are you doing this for free". She answered, "well, we are in town for 3 weeks and I don't want to work out alone. That way I have people to work out with.". Okay, I'm now in love with the best idea ever.
What a great idea!!! Find something you like to do. Tell others that you are offering it "for free" - boom, you suddenly have a group of people all doing what you like to do!
Yes, we all spoke about how it hard to go do something on your own, by yourself. It's always easier when you have someone else. Yet, here we were, a group of individuals, going to do something by ourselves with other people.
Then in turn, I told them about me and the Canoe Club. "It's right here, Tues/Thurs/Sat at 6:30am or 8am - be about ten minutes early. It's a great group. Everyone is very friendly and it's free." (If you want to join the club you can, which I did today - the dues are good for a year)
One of the women from boot camp showed up this morning for paddling, and she brought a friend. Another one showed up for the 8am group.
And so it continues.....
Being the Bigger Person
It's hard to be the bigger person. Not give into pettiness. I believe it's a daily challenge for most people NOT to play the game.
What is easy? To fight fire with fire. I'm good at winning things. Only most of the time, you realize if you have to fight for something, it's really not fighting for. Standing up for what you believe in, is worth fighting it.
SO, we have an ex-boyfriend's current girlfriend whom just cringes when I walk up. Rightly so, I think I would cringe as well if I had to see a boyfriends ex-girlfriend every day. Wait, scratch that. I wouldn't cringe. After all, if I'm the one with the boyfriend, why would an EX girlfriend of MY boyfriend cause me any concern? I'm living with him after all.
If I were insecure and immature, maybe. As mentioned previously, the teenagers around here are acting more mature than some adults.
Aren't we all a bit insecure? Of course we are. Everyone has different levels of insecurity -
Maybe it's:
But from someone on the OUTSIDE of your problems, it would be easy for me to tell you what to do.
(Don't you hate it when people do that???) You know, tell you the way you SHOULD behave and the way you SHOULD act.
I think that is the problem. We listen to other people. Instead of acting with kindness and realizing even if they did hurt us, that's the past, and there is nothing we can do about it now.
Most of the time, other people don't really disappoint us, it's OUR expectation of others that disappoints us. Yes, sometimes people do disappoint. They tell you they will do something and they don't do it. That is disappointing.
A dear friend of mine didn't come to my grandfathers funeral. He told me he would. It still hurts me that he didn't show up. He lived in the same town. He disappointed me.
I keep trying to be the bigger person and let it go, but I can't. He knows it too. We don't need to talk about it. But an apology sure would be nice. But that's MY expectation on the friendship situation. Not his.
Isn't that funny? Or is it just me? A simple apology is all I want. I'll either get the apology one day, or it will fade into the background of our friendship. I'm sure he thinks I owe him an apology for something else.
But tomorrow, I can't apologize to anyone for being the ex-girlfriend. Or apologize for being the mom of the boys whom the teenage girl loves. I can be kind - even if it is not returned.
I can be the bigger person.
What is easy? To fight fire with fire. I'm good at winning things. Only most of the time, you realize if you have to fight for something, it's really not fighting for. Standing up for what you believe in, is worth fighting it.
SO, we have an ex-boyfriend's current girlfriend whom just cringes when I walk up. Rightly so, I think I would cringe as well if I had to see a boyfriends ex-girlfriend every day. Wait, scratch that. I wouldn't cringe. After all, if I'm the one with the boyfriend, why would an EX girlfriend of MY boyfriend cause me any concern? I'm living with him after all.
If I were insecure and immature, maybe. As mentioned previously, the teenagers around here are acting more mature than some adults.
Aren't we all a bit insecure? Of course we are. Everyone has different levels of insecurity -
Maybe it's:
- trying something new
- calling someone for the first time
- asking a stranger directions
- Admitting you miss someone
- Making a right turn, instead of a left, because you've always made a left.
- leaving the house some days
- leaving the house without your car
- trusting yourself - as you know you have failed yourself before.
But from someone on the OUTSIDE of your problems, it would be easy for me to tell you what to do.
(Don't you hate it when people do that???) You know, tell you the way you SHOULD behave and the way you SHOULD act.
I think that is the problem. We listen to other people. Instead of acting with kindness and realizing even if they did hurt us, that's the past, and there is nothing we can do about it now.
Most of the time, other people don't really disappoint us, it's OUR expectation of others that disappoints us. Yes, sometimes people do disappoint. They tell you they will do something and they don't do it. That is disappointing.
A dear friend of mine didn't come to my grandfathers funeral. He told me he would. It still hurts me that he didn't show up. He lived in the same town. He disappointed me.
I keep trying to be the bigger person and let it go, but I can't. He knows it too. We don't need to talk about it. But an apology sure would be nice. But that's MY expectation on the friendship situation. Not his.
Isn't that funny? Or is it just me? A simple apology is all I want. I'll either get the apology one day, or it will fade into the background of our friendship. I'm sure he thinks I owe him an apology for something else.
But tomorrow, I can't apologize to anyone for being the ex-girlfriend. Or apologize for being the mom of the boys whom the teenage girl loves. I can be kind - even if it is not returned.
I can be the bigger person.
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