Thursday, July 12, 2012

Sneaking Out

Whom hasn't snuck out of their house?  Or snuck someone in?

Once in like, I don't know 9th or 10th grade - Laurel and I snuck out - to the end of her drive way.  ;-)  David and Peter came over to hang out.  We were all just friends and I guess we had to be home before them.  I don't really remember, what we did, but hang out and probably listen to music.  But I do know her parents were asleep and we had "gone to bed".  (I can't say this was the only time I've snuck out!)

Again those years are re-approaching.  Only this time, I'm the mom.  I feel a bit like Wendy in Peter Pan.  When he returns, only to find Wendy grown.  I'm now Wendy and Peter and his friends are my boys.

Our property here on the island has a main house and two ohana's (ohana meaning family)  They build houses here with houses for their "family".  Most people rent them out.  I'm staying in the main house (there are about 2 acres or so here).  The second ohana is rented out year round to a local girl.
 Just for clairification, this is a WONDERFUL, INCREDIBLE house.  It is in NO WAY FANCY.  The owner Joe, is a mid 60's bachelor.  It's amazing the cleaning I've done since I've been here!

Sorry for the tangent there!  Nolan has been staying in one ohana.  Basically, he has his own apartment for the summer.  We had some friends from Denver arrive - the three boys slept up there and the other two adults and little girl here in the main house.  

My summer daughter couldn't spend the night while they were here - except the one night our Denver friends were on the other side of the island.  When she stays over, she sleeps here in the main house with me.  She comes right in, she knows where her stuff goes, she has a toothbrush here, on and on.  You get the idea.  Well, since our friends were in "her" room, the pull out couch was out.  

The ohana is good size.  There is one queen bed, a blow up bed that Duncan has been sleeping on and a couch.  (plus a mini kitchen, a table and chairs and a bathroom).

Lily you are sleeping on the pull out couch.  No big deal.  

The kids all go up to the ohana to watch a movie.  I'm uploading pictures to my share site.  I'm getting a little work done - and they all know I usually go to bed around 10.  Anything after that, and, well, I'm not really functional anyway.  SOOOOO, I told my summer daughter, it was okay if she fell asleep watching the movie in the onaha - oh yeah, there is a TV and DVD player too....

Look, I know this would never happen in the real world.  If this was one of your friends at home, NO, this would not be happening.  Yes, we are in Kona and I guess the "summer rules" apply.  Of course, they have all spent SO much time together, their mannerisms have even started to mimic each other.  

BUT, being the smart girl she is - she came back to the house twice - once to brush her teeth.  The other time?  She was pretending she was going to bed.  It was actually really cute.  I was at the kitchen table still working on pictures.....  (much to her dismay)

I finally told her, "As far as I'm concerned, you were on the pull out bed when I went to bed".  I did the honorable thing, and went to bed while she was "on her bed".  

No, I didn't hear her leave.

When I woke up and started to work the next morning, I was in the house alone.  Granted, it's 5 am and I went up to the ohana.  Nolan's in his bed.  Duncan is in his bed and my summer daughter is asleep on the couch.

I wasn't sure if I should be proud or be mad at one of the boys for not giving up their bed.  I was proud of all of them - the TV was still on........

(and please - even if we all knew she was going to spend the night on the couch in the ohana, just let me have this moment!) ;-)



Ever have those days when you "DREAD" getting out of bed or "DREAD" doing something?

We all do.  In the winter, I sometimes dread getting out of bed, just thinking "do I really have to do everything I have to do today?".  I don't WANT to work, take the kids to hockey, cook, clean, etc.- none of it.  If I get out of bed, I will have to do it all.  I DON"T want to!!! 

Luckily, my days of "dread" don't last long.  A day here.  A day there.  It's not depression.  It's normal.  Don't we all want to just play???

Days of "dread" on the island are completely different.  I wake up way too early.  I now have a rule.  I won't get out of bed until after 5 am.  4am is still the middle of the night - I don't care when you go to bed!  Now, when I wake up, I have to lay there for a bit.  (Usually, I'm a get out of bed immediately kind of person).  Truly, I think I'm scared to get out of bed. Because I know, I will not sit down until 10pm at night. 

I know what you are thinking.  She has all afternoon at the beach!!!  I work until 11 or 12.  Of course, now I run Duncan to Jr Lifeguard training at the beach (Kahaluu Beach Park) that is trying to kill me.  (Yes, it is ironic - maybe my own son will get to swim out next time to get me!) at 9.  I then get back and work some more. He's done at noon.  It really works out nicely in our day.  (More on that later) I then get back and work some more.

At times, we all try to be something we are not.  I try on a daily basis to think I'm the type of person who can lay on the beach and read a book.  Sometimes, I can sit and read, but that's for about 20 minutes.  Then I'm playing volleyball with the kids.  Boogie boarding, swimming laps, going for run, you get the idea.  I'm doing everything but sitting still. 

Then, there is all that other normal stuff - grocery store, laundry, cooking.  You know life.  The good/bad thing about life on the island:  you get TWO FULL DAYS, in every day.  You work and you play. 

In the morning, I have to lay there for bit in bed to think about the day ahead.  There is that sense of dread.  Dread of getting out of bed.  Instead of dreading the mundane things of every day life, my first real thought?  My "dread of the day" - how am I going to survive this day?  Survive in meaning, I hope I pack enough in, and I hope I enjoy it enough.  I don't want to waste a single minute - I hope I still have it in me.  I think I dread the thought that I might not still have it in me.

You would think I would learn to just, well, forget that thought, I better just go be whom I am.  Dread and all......

Monday, July 9, 2012


I'm dirty. Grimy and EXHAUSTED.  As I've said before, that WONDERFUL DIRTY GRIMY EXHAUSTED.  And I wouldn't change a thing.

We've decided:  people watch us.  Of course, I LOVE to watch people, but we are being watched.

I "met" Carolyn and I today.  Only we are in our 70's.  I sent Carolyn a text and told her so, and I told her "I just met us in 30 years, with Marie."  After thinking about the text, it wouldn't be Marie - she will be in her 30's in 30 years.  The girl with "us" was in her early 20's.  So, I guess I met "us" and our "grand-daughter".  We are still fun. 

Fun in the way - as I'm walking across the beach, to the bar, at the hotel next to the public beach, they stop me, to tell me they like my dress.  It's cute on me.  And it's very flattering.  And I should own a few more of them.  I explained I had been wearing this dress all summer, they understood.  They said I should wear it all summer.  One of them was in a wheelchair (that will be me, because I don't know how to say "I'm too old to do that anymore".) Truly, if I didn't have three kids running around a resort that we aren't staying at, well, I would have sat down.  I would like to know we turn out okay - well, never mind, we know that answer.

The kids - they are dirty - DIRTY.  Sand in your face, in your swimsuit, in your toes kind of dirty.  This is my FAVORITE beach.  I was a little disappointed when I found out it was man-made.  No wonder it's so perfect.  AS IN - PERFECT - just go look at the pictures:  -

Lily is keeping track of how many times people think she and the boys are siblings.  We are up to 8 - 2 today.  Wait, maybe that's 3 today.  The really funny thing is:  We are white people.  We just all have the same eyes.  Someone even asked Nolan and Lily if they were twins (this was before Duncan arrived).  Seriously?  She's a foot taller than him, and his hair is very blonde.  It's fun to watch.  It's fun to be the mom.

If that doesn't make you feel dirty, nothing else will......

Sunday, July 8, 2012

More Better

One of the radio stations in town says the phrase "More Better".  "We are going to make your day 'more better'".  Every time we hear it, we all smile.  "More Better". Yes, we know, it's not "proper" and it's not correct, but hey, it makes us smile.

We have some friends from Denver staying with us for a week.  They are going to the volcano area for a couple of nights, but have been here since July 3.  This is a great incredible place and I don't want them to miss a thing - SO here we go - let's GO......

The kids and I go to Kua Bay (one of my favorite beaches) and wait for their plane to land.  It's about 10 minutes North of the Airport.  Literally, I'm on the beach, with four kids, and we see their plane.  The funny thing is, they see our beach from the plane and go WOW.  I see the plane and say "I've got to go!" I leave the four kids at the beach (can't get in the water until I return).  Go pick up our friends at the airport and bring them back to the beach.

Okay, and really, it's still hectic from there, but it's dropping/picking up/Costco/the pier/sushi/the house - in a round about way.....

The way I really plan my vacations; wait; make that my life:  One day busy, next day, well busy, just not hectic.  Paddle Boat Riding; Fireworks, walking through town; parades and happy people.

Magic Sand Beach - there was a SWELL.  A SWELL that traveled 6000 miles to cause havoc on the beaches of Hawaii.  Waves so strong and incredible, we couldn't even ride them.  The lifeguards went out 5 times in 1 hour.  2 ambulances came.  Then of course, it calmed down, and we played in the waves.

Now we all know, you don't really know someone until you travel with them.  I'm just glad my friends are still my friends.  Ready?  Okay, NOW, we are going to drive your rental car down a 25% grade, swim across a river and hike to a waterfall.  To me, the most wonderful thing about the whole day?  THEY LOVED IT.  In fact, they thanked me for taking them.  And the dad's face at the end of the day - well, we had another teenager with us.  SO excited about our day.

That made me SO happy.

When you love something or someone and you get to share what you love with others, it makes it all even more wonderful.

It doesn't get "More Better" than this.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

My Summer Daughter

I have a "Summer Daughter".  What a delight.

I LOVE having boys.  Everything about boys.  Adventurous, Dirty, Exhausting, Insecure, Brave - and on and on and on - and USUALLY, no drama.  Although we are hitting the teenage years, we might have some hormonal drama yet to come.  AND, not that girls couldn't be all the things I listed above - I just don't know - I don't have girls.

Carolyn and her daughter were in Denver to visit one time and we were "building" something.  Then my next action, was well, to say "how can we destroy this?"  She reminded me, we don't have to "destroy what we build".  AH - girls build it to play with it; boys build it to tear it down.

We are just different.  Boys and girls.  That's okay.  We should be different.  We should also not want boys to be more like us or us more like them.  We are different.

But this summer, I have a girl. In addition, to my two boys. A beautiful, wonderful, sweet, kind-hearted daughter.  She is everything you would want in a daughter.

In fact, I'm so used to her being here, and we now have friends here - I keep saying there are "four of us".

She lives with her mom on the mainland 9 months out of the year.  With her dad, for 2 months in the summer and a month during the year in California.  But this summer, she is my "summer daughter".

She's a swimmer.  She calls me when something is wrong.  Her mom calls me too when something is wrong.  In fact, her mom calls me and tells me she is so glad I'm here. It takes a mighty big person to refer to someone else as her daughters "summer mama".  As she said (her mom) - "when my daughter loves another woman other than her mama, this woman must be special and deserve my respect."

As I told her dad, 13 year old girls don't like anyone. She LIKES ME. Granted, I do come with two boys her age (she is exactly in between the two) - so I know that doesn't hurt my ratings any... ;-) 

And she wants to be here.  With us.  And the worst part is, so does her dad.  He's just trying to do what he said he would do - and BOY is he grumpy.  He's grumpy at her.  He's grumpy to everyone around him.  He's GRUMPY.  The sad thing is - he's not a grumpy guy.  He's the happiest guy in the world. Usually.

There is a couple whom lives next door to my summer daughter and her dad.  Their names are Davey and Ryan.  We were at their house for dinner.  Towards the end of the evening, Davey and I were on the porch.  He says to me "Lily LOVES you".  "I know", I replied, "so does her dad." He replies, "well, we all know that".

All in good time.

In the meantime, I have a summer daughter.  She has a "Summer Mama" - and if she has her way, one day,  my grandson will be named Oliver.... ;-)  Oh, the things girls try to plan.....

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Happy Days

There are no words to describe my feelings for today. 

I am happy.  HAPPY.

There are a million self help books out there.  There are millions of counselors out there.  We hear things all the time about "being true to ourselves" - make things better, live, breathe, feel, blah, blah blah... ;-)  Okay, maybe not "blah, blah, blah" more like "yadda, yadda, yadda".  On and on and on.

What you really need is:  do something that makes you happy.  HAPPY.  Not powerful, not fun, not thrilling - HAPPY.  When is he last time you did something that made you happy?  I think we equate the thought "if you aren't happy, you are unhappy."  I think, it's "you are okay - then you are happy or not happy" 

Today, I am happy.  It was Nolan's 13th birthday.  And, I'm not an UNHAPPY person.  I'm not sad.  Yes, I have bad days, we all do.  I don't usually stay sad.  Truly, I'm a simple girl with simple wants and needs.   I want to be happy.

That's the really funny thing.  I'm always happy.  BUT, today, I was HAPPY.  Today, there, well, became here.  Duncan (my oldest son) arrived last night. Lily has spent the last three nights with us.  Duncan popped right up on the paddle board. 

I ACTUALLY WAS UP ON THE PADDLE BOARD FOR 10 or so minutes (more on that later) - AND I DIDN'T HURT MYSELF (or anyone else for that matter).  I look heavier in the pictures than I wish I looked, but I'm on the board - AND I HAVE A PICTURE.

That's not what made me happy.  I was happy before we got to the beach.

I woke up with my sons here.  My summer daughter here too.  There were puppies up the street at the "mean dog" house.  There were fresh Lycees waiting for me around the corner from the neighbor.  There was chaos in this house and no drama.  Chaos - the where are the pancakes?  When are we going to the beach?  The I haven't brushed my hair in two weeks.  Boxers shorts on the back lanai - because why would we go inside to change? Oh, and mom, I forgot, can we go back and get my shoes, I forgot those too. There was love and contentment.  

Nolan and I were in the truck to take Lily home this morning (she sleeps in the room next to mine)  and I said "I haven't been this happy in a long time".  He replied, "I didn't know you were unhappy".  "I wasn't unhappy.  I'm just that much more happier today."  Right now.  This second. 

Here in the real world..........

(Yes, I know - it should be just "much happier", but the radio station in Kona all the time says "we are going to make your day "more better".  If I can be "more better", I can be "more happier).......

Monday, July 2, 2012


This might be one of my favorite stories EVER.  That says a lot.

Yesterday - July 1.  My day of new beginnings.

Nolan, Lily and I take to kayak's to an area called Captain Cook.  (Lily is my summer daughter - more on that later).  You have to "drop in the kayak" about a 30 minute kayak ride south of Captain Cook.  You pay the nice guy (Rufus) to help drop you in the water and help you back out.  (Worth every penny of the $10).

Favorite moment of the day #1:  I say to Rufus - you've been working here a long time right?  Yeah.  You had to swim out and rescue me last year when my boat had a hole in it.  Oh, that's right - you haven't been here in a while.  Then he proceeds to tell everyone how he rescued me last year (see the First Ocean Water rescue blog to read the story).  Pretty funny.

We set off - Nolan and I are in the double kayak, Lily in the single.  (They were fighting over who got the single).

We get to the Captain Cook statue (he "founded" the island) - they later ate him.  Yes, roasted - as in Cooked!  ;-)

We tie up the kayaks, we snorkel, we get out at the statue, we snorkel some more.  We are sitting watching the tourists boats.  Lily remarks, Oh, the Fairwinds, we did that last year.  You know what?  We should just go over and get on the boat.  (I promise you this was NOT my idea).  We laugh, we come up with funny stories about what we would say, on and on.  Finally, Lily says "we should do this - they are cooking hamburgers, I'm hungry".  So, I say, "Ok, let's go".  The look on their faces was priceless.  Really??? Nolan:  "Mom, are you serious?".  Sure, let's go.

We swim over to the boat, we climb up the ladder.  We are trying so hard not to just giggle.  The kids go off the boat slides, they jump off the "high deck board".  Then the food is ready.  I'm like "no, we really shouldn't".  After they opened the chips, Lily gets a cup full of chips and we standing there when one of the crew says to Lily - "you don't have to just steal a cup of chips - go get a burger".  Then he says to Nolan - aren't you hungry?  Nolan replies "no"  He says, well then take one to go.  I guess it was obvious that we hadn't been there on the whole trip.

We go get burgers, sodas.  As we are eating, the boat starts to move.  Turns out, it was a false alarm.  We ate, played a bit more.  Then we dove off the boat and snorkeled back to our kayaks, and went back to our harbor.  Yelling at the boat the whole time "Thanks for the burgers"...........

These two kids may be 13, but I'm getting to be 13, just for the summer......